Day 58: Like Lipstick on a Pig

Madison, Mississippi is just a hop, skip, and jump North of Jackson. There are no movie theaters in Jackson proper, so on Saturday night Damen and I trekked up there to see Madagascar 3. We both love architecture and design and were again delighted by the the opportunity to relish in the horror of the tasteless architectural guidelines dictated by the city. After the film, we did a Google search to see if someone has created a blog or album dedicated to the tacky application of beige, brick, Corinthian pilasters and cupolas to every business in town. No one has, though there is an article from 2006 by Ali Greggs that was published by the Jackson Free Press that captures the atmosphere of the "vanilla city."

Before Damen headed back to Starkville on Sunday, we drove up there again and took photos of the buildings that make us cringe the most. I ended up with more than 100 photos, which didn't capture even half of the businesses that belong in the collection. I'll share just a few of my favorites. 

Here's Damen's drawn-out metaphor for the architecture: " I loved Hee Haw, and Roy Clark and Buck Owen are in my heart and memory. Imagine if, one day, you were watching Hee Haw, and Roy was dressed up like Henry the Eighth and Buck was dressed like a French King, and you're thinking "Man, this skit's expensive!" But they're acting like nothing's special, and you're watching the next week, and they're still dressed like that. And it keeps going, and you learn that the FCC made them dress like that because the government got the idea that Hee Haw just wasn't respectable enough, but somehow, the FCC got the wrong idea of what respectable WAS. I've seen CVS in nice towns, and Corinthian columns is NOT what real money puts on a pharmacy."

This is Damen's stand-out example. The art nouveau arch makes so little sense with the rest of the building, which features one of the town's highest concentration of Corinthian pilasters and ionic pillars on a single structure.

This is the one that I love to hate the most.

This! Is! Kroger!

So, can you purchase those Corinthian pilasters inside too?

Nice cupola, Best Buy.

Many gas stations in town feature Corinthian columns.

Finials make it extra classy; The art nouveau overhang tacked over the standard glass front is a nice touch; We can't forget the obligatory pilasters and fake stone blocks as well.

This is the BACK of the CVS: This pushes Damen's buttons full force. His reaction is hilarious.

And that's just a few. There's a whole town full of this stuff. Madison's official website states that it's purpose is to  "recall the grand pre-war Italianate architecture of the area," but in application it's just a big post-modern mess. Fascinating.

Length of feather: 2 1/2"